Feminism empowered

Sod the men, now it's all about me. So, the online dating hasn't worked out. I'm too picky and I need the anticipation, the connection, to feel anything before and after a date.  The last 2 'natural's I have got involved with, are already in (supposedly) committed relationships. Which I was informed of AFTER they broke their vows. Whether I am the only time this has happened is beside the point. Given that I am now infuriated and disgusted with the male species, I have made a decision. I am done with dating. Now, I just want a fuck buddy. I'm done trying to see it from their point of view, trying to understand why they are unfaithful and empathise that they must be unhappy. No, maybe they just like sex. Whatever. It's back to 2D, flat, uninsightful analysis. They cheat. And I am NOT willing to be the vehicle that enables them.  I have no idea what awaits me at the office today. People saw us flirting Tuesday, but hopefully that's as much as they know. I really didn't want to get something started with him, it was purely physical. His pillow talk, trying to let me know about his life, and his failure to tell me he was engaged were really disrespectful to me. So fuck him. And like I said, he gets professional. And that's only for the sake of my professional reputation. Yes I'm a little hurt, but I didn't have to be. If he'd just stopped talking and got on with it I wouldn't have had to listen to his lies. It was supposed to be purely physical, but by lying and telling me about his family he made it something else. I'm not an idiot. And neither am I an addict. I'm like a surfer, seeking the ultimate wave. Or the ultimate night of pleasure. Like my (female) colleague said, I'm young free single and attractive. After years of crap sex with my ex, I'm getting what I want. And I don't care how selfish that sounds. So a fuck buddy, with zero conversation, would be perfect. And if anyone asks or says anything, I'll deny it all. Especially if it gets back to the gorgeous guy I have fancied for a couple of months now. Not that that will ever happen; he's too religious. He would not be a good prospect for a fuck buddy - definitely feelings there. Plus, we work together. But maybe I have to accept that chances are, I will get involved with someone I work with.