The last couple of nights I have been waking to rather strange dreams. A faceless man - as in, I can see his features but I don't know who he is - is making love to me and encouraging me to look in his eyes as I climax.
On the tube at rush hour an extremely gorgeous rugby player was pushed up against me. His butt kept knocking into my elbow. Pure muscle. And I realised how powerful he must be.
It was nice to be in the vicinity of an attractive guy for a change. But the annoying thing was it aroused my libido from it's winter slumber. Bugger. Thus today has been spent in a somewhat more sexually aware state. Really not helped by a new office with a lot of sexy men. The nature of the organisation and the work means they are probably decent guys too. But as I want to forge a career at this company there is no way in hell I am breaking my rule and dating someone from work. That's assuming, of course, that any of them find me attractive. Which I seriously doubt.
So in order to get this out of my system I'm going to do what I have so far avoided doing. I'm going to discuss physical detail.
I miss having the weight of my man on top of me. I miss his hips pushing my legs wider apart as he thrusts. I miss wrapping my thighs around his flank and crushing him. I miss raking my nails down his back, biting his shoulder and arching into him. I miss grabbing his bum and pushing him into me, rocking together in rhythmic unison. I miss passionate kisses as we both take great pleasure in what we are doing. I miss how good his dick can make my pussy feel. I miss him biting kissing and licking the place where my shoulder meets my neck. I miss how the tiniest, softest touch can make me go crazy. I miss how much harder I came with him than on my own. I miss rolling around on the floor, bed, sofa. I miss good sex injuries - carpet burn back, burnt arse from doing it on the oven, backache from the physical challenge of doing it in the shower.
In short, I miss sex! And I think these dreams, as much as they are primarily about trust and intimacy, are also showing me what I already knew - I am a sexual being, and I need to get laid. But as much as I know that, I also know the difference between fantasy and reality, and I respect my mental and physical health too much to just go out and shag the first dick available. In fact I'm so committed to this lifestyle, I'm not even going to buy a rabbit.
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